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Should You Be a “Submissive” Wife? | Couples Therapy in Hermosa Beach

By: Cathy Chambliss

Date: May 29, 2015

Man and woman about to kiss

If you are in need of Couples Therapy in Hermosa Beach are, you may find that this article resonates with you.

Have you seen the new show on TLC “How To Be A Submissive Wife”? The title of the show sounds pretty awful to most women. The premise of the show is that the Bible describes specific male and female roles in marriage and that by being submissive to your man, you will have a happier marriage and avoid divorce. As a marriage therapist, I don’t particularly like the word submissive. When I think of the word submissive , it almost feels like someone is being repressed. However, I do think that in many marriages, it is good be be clear about what each partner’s role is in the marriage. Often times couples fight and get into power struggles because they both want equal say in the decisions regarding money, child rearing, vacations, decorating, etc… They argue because they sometimes are not seeing that their partner may actually be better at certain things yet they don’t want to give up their power in the relationship.

The idea behind being “submissive” is more about respecting your husband for what he is good at and honoring him. Women are so naturally talented at so many things. They are wonderful nurturers, mothers , great at keeping connections alive and good muti taskers. The idea behind being “submissive” is to use your feminine energy to connect with your husband and he will treat you with honor and respect. Of course this would never work if you are in an abusive relationship. If there is abuse, you must get out and away from the person treating you badly. However, if you find that you are regularly getting into arguments and power struggles with your husband, perhaps it is time to look at what role you play in the dynamic.

I help women in counseling to look at themselves and support them in having healthier happier marriages. And no it is not about being submissive, it is about tapping into your femininity to help balance the relationship. Please let me help you with any Couples Therapy in Hermosa Beach.

 

 

 

photo credit: 00-49 via photopin (license)

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